There were many reasons I was
scared of surgery. I didn’t want
to be on medication for the rest of my life. I didn’t want a three-inch scar across my neck. I didn’t want to have a thyroid storm
(where the thyroid freaks out and it could cause me to gain 20 pounds in 2
weeks) during surgery. I didn’t
want to wait a few months for my neck to heal to start dancing again. I was scared
that my vocal cords would be permanently damaged (rarely happens but a
possibility). There were many
other reasons I didn’t want to have surgery but when the morning came I was
ready to get it over with.
The lady at the desk signed me in,
and then got my dad to sign my papers.
Apparently I was supposed to sign those papers, but she didn’t know that
I wasn’t a minor…Yes I know. I’m
19 and I look like I’m 12. So, I
signed some paperwork and I was off!
I got really nervous because this was my first time in the hospital…besides
when I was born of course! My mom,
dad, and grandad came back for the last couple minutes before I went into
surgery. I gave them all hugs from
my bed and my grandad gave me kiss on the forehead from him and my nana. It was one of the sweetest moments ever.
They wheeled me off to the
operation room. I changed tables
and I remember the crew all looking over me, giving me oxygen, and knocked me
out…
I woke up later, in another room,
tried to rub my eye but hit myself in the face cause my arms were like noodles I had some ice chips and then I could
go up to my recovery room. The
room looked like a hotel, so. I
got to change into the cutest little gown you ever saw haha! My face was green
from the stuff the used to sterilize. The surgeon said everything went extremely well, and I didn't have a thyroid storm. My dad told him we had been blessed with many prayers.
It was like starting from the
beginning. I learned to swallow
apple juice, then jello, and worked my way up to ice cream! I learned to lift my head again but I
still couldn’t turn it. Later a
walk down the hall and back made me extremely tired. By the time I would finally fall asleep I would have to wake
up to check vital signs, or get calcium tests, or take pain killers, etc. The nurse was so nice though! And I had a great time catching up on Say Yes to The Dress and HGTV.
Now I’m home, recovering well. But it’s not over yet! My voice is still hoarse but getting
better. I still have to see if I
need eye surgery or radiation. It
could take a while to get my medicine adjusted and all. So I still get to do more waiting! Yay! :) I
think I might have accidently prayed for patience a couple months ago… Because I am learning ALL about patience now. If I do get the opportunity to
serve a mission, doesn’t matter where, I’m going to be SOOO grateful for it. Without this little trial, I feel that
I might have taken the experience for granted.
One of my favorite quotes right now
is “Life is a hard teacher because it gives the test first and the lesson
later.” So even though a lot of
things don’t make sense in the present moment, they will make sense in hindsight
because everything happens for a reason.
You may not understand it today.
You may not understand it tomorrow, but later down on your journey that
trial will have prepared you in a way nothing else could have. I still don’t understand the meaning
behind a lot of these things happening in my life but I’ve gained a lot from
this experience that I wouldn’t have learned in any other way. I learned that there is always someone
who has it worse. Everyone has
different trials, specific and unique.
I wouldn’t trade my experience for someone else’s hardships. These hard times mold us into the
person we will become.
Ashlee! I loved following your blog! You are so loved and so blessed! I miss you lots but Hey! We are only 2 1/2 hours away now! Please keep us updated with the recovery! Love you!
ReplyDeleteIsn't Grandad beyond wonderful? He's always there when you need him!
ReplyDeleteAshea - you're only 2 1/2 hours away!? We might have to take a roadtrip and meet-up! I miss you lots too!! Thanks! Love you too!!!
ReplyDeleteMeg- Yes he is for sure!!!